Work and Play (and some thoughts about Angelina)

I can’t believe how long it has been since I last blogged. I have been neglecting my duties of keeping up my health status and thoughts about random things and pink things.  I just read my last post that said something along the lines of “because I am off of work for a bit hopefully I can post more.” Ha. 

So 2 weeks after surgery hubby and I decided to jet off to Palm Springs for a little rest and relaxation…and shopping obviously! Surgeon didn’t have a problem with us going and we had a great time. The 2^nd or 3^rd day there I may have did a little too much trying on clothes (tops to be specific) and made my pec a little sore. Then I decided to try my luck at a little swimming – which further hurt my chest and then resulted in some soreness that didn’t go away until I was back at work.  But I think no pain – no gain!

A lot of people think I’m a bit of a sissy and can’t handle much (yes I run screaming for my life and using anything in my hands to swat that harmless bumble bee that went by me) but I like to think I am a pretty resilient person. I have spoken to a lot of survivors and learned that we all have our own pain and hang ups (for lack of a better term) from treatment. I sometimes feel like something that sets me apart is that I don’t let pain stop me. For example – the majority of survivors that I know won’t sleep on their chests because of the pain it still continues to cause them (months out of surgery.) A week after this most recent surgery I was back on my chest – not the most comfortable thing but this breast cancer business is not getting in between me and my sleep. And gradually with laying on my chest the pain has disappeared. I really believe that you have to go through a bit of pain to come out better on the other side.  Same thing kind of relates to my job – yea it hurts going back every time after surgery – but working at a vet clinic what other choice do I have but to jump in and just do it? 

So what have I been doing since we got back from Palm Springs…well I am obviously back at work (have been for a couple months) – but there is nothing exciting about that. We have got together with a couple survivors over the last few months for dinner and to talk about the after cancer life. I can’t imagine being that table beside 2 girls in their 20’s talking about their breast cancer experience, lack of nipples and the excitement of good areola tattooing. How awkward would that be! But when you are in it you can’t help but to compare the girls, talk about the bad and the future. It really is a great time – no tears just so much laughing. Although living through cancer sucks the after is pretty cool. The support system from you peers that have gone through it is something nothing can compare to and you can’t explain until you are in it. You know the others fears and hopes without them saying it. And they know yours. 

I FINALLY had that stupid MRI that had to be rebooked. This time I didn’t go get the ultrasound guided iv catheter and I didn’t take Ativan. I had already given up a day for this dumb test I wasn’t going to try my hardest not to waste another one.  My wonderful husband lay in the room with me while I had the scan (a pelvic MRI is 100x easier than a breast MRI), rubbed my head and played with a staple. Apparently it was stuck to the side of the machine and he would take it off and see where it went next – how exciting this was for him! Anyways, they were looking at a cyst I had on my ovary for several months that wasn’t resolving (cysts are pretty normal on ovaries but usually they shrink/pop). In between the failed MRI and this one I felt the cyst pop and I knew it was gone. I tried to tell them that so they didn’t waste their time but they wanted to go ahead with the scan anyways – and I passed.

I have also been crazy busy lately doing in house dog training. I completed a course through a school in the states about 2.5 years ago but haven’t really had the chance to use what I learned through that and through experience at the clinic. So I decided recently to post a kijiji add and see what happened! I have had amazing response from the add and I am pretty excited to see where it takes me. I am learning what areas specifically in dog training I enjoy the best and it is behaviour problems around anxiety – such as destruction and separation issues. That pretty much sums up our crazy life!

I guess all that is left to talk about is this Angelina Jolie business. I have a lot of people asking me lately what I think of what she did and what the media is doing with it. I think awareness wise – it’s great! Not enough people understand the consequences of being diagnosed with a BRCA mutation.  People sit back and make judgements about ‘how could you do that surgery’ or ‘why don’t you just get screened’ and it’s not that easy. A lot of people don’t understand that the younger you are – the more aggressive your cancer is. They don’t understand that until a later age young woman aren’t even told to do breast exams! I think making a decision, such as a bilateral mastectomy, is something only brave and selfless woman could make.  Angelina lost her Mom at a very young age and didn’t want to leave her family over something that can be prevented. I want to be able to have children and don’t want to constantly feel my breasts wondering is that a lump? They aren’t a vital enough organ for BRCA mutation carriers to take that chance – or have to. Now… what do I think of what the media is doing with this information. After about 5 minutes of hearing about it I got a little tired of it. I guess it isn’t news to me that this mutation exists and I have all the info I need about it. But I wonder is the media downplaying the people that have had cancer? Let’s list the ones I know about and I bet you will be surprised

-        -  Cynthia Nixon (Sex & the City)

-         - Kylie Minogue

-          -Christina Applegate (also a BRCA carrier)

-          -Melissa Etheridge

-          -Olivia Newton –John

-          -Sheryl Crow

-          -Bif Naked

-          -Sharon Osbourne (also a BRCA carrier, had colon cancer not breast, had a double mastectomy)

I have barely touched on all the famous people that have had breast cancer. Yet I bet you couldn’t tell me one of their stories?  This is what I find extremely frustrating about Angelina Jolie’s story. Yes she had major surgery, yes it’s scary for her, but she didn’t go through chemo, auxiliary node dissections, radiation and a life time of scans to see if her cancer will come back and kill her.  We should be profiling Olivia Newton-John who 20 years (!!!!) ago fought and won breast cancer. Ask her how her muscles feel after radiation; ask her if she still feels like a woman and how she kept her femininity when at a young age she went through chemo induced menopause (assuming she went through chemo).  I just don’t like to see someone who has had preventive surgery take the spot light from women who have fought their hardest to stay alive. Most of these woman have won but a lot of have not. Let’s not forget about them.