This one is for Megan

Yesterday was my 26^th birthday. On one hand I feel like I have the usual responses, moaning and groaning about getting older and life passing me by. On the other hand (the cancer one) I am very happy that I get the chance to get older every day and celebrate birthday’s cancer free. Pretty awesome feeling. 

I had a great birthday. I spent Friday night out with our friends having sushi – only my favorite food.  Saturday with my hubby’s family and Sunday with mine. I have so much love around me and I really have learned to appreciate the time I get with everyone.  I was super spoiled so went out today to spend some money on new lulu clothes and Toms. Like I said, it was a great birthday. 

2.5 weeks ago I had my final fill. No more visits until my next surgery in January (still waiting for my date – I will post it once I hear.) It was a tough fill – I had a lot of pain, up and down my torso. From my hips all the way up to my shoulders. I still have a pain when sleeping. The implants are so heavy now that if I lay on my side or on my stomach and try to get up – the weight pulls on the muscle and causes a lot of burning pain. I have a feeling this won’t go away until I get the smaller, permanent implants put in. It’s annoying and I’m figuring out how to work around it but can’t wait until they are gone. Stupid things. 

Left                          Right

180ml              120ml < Time of surgery

240ml              180ml < additional 60ml at first check up

300ml              270ml < Additional 60ml in left and 90ml in the right

360ml              360ml < Additional 60ml in the left and 90ml in the right

 
450ml              450ml <additional 90ml in both

550 ml             550 ml < additional 100ml in both

650 ml             650 ml < additional 100ml in both

So, as you can see, I know have 1.3 litres of saline on my chest. As I’m sure you can imagine my muscles and skin are at their max. I am so glad I don’t have to wait long for surgery...it would drive me crazy.

On a sad note…as a family we had to come to a devastating decision 2 weeks ago. We had noticed our 13.5 year old golden retriever, Megan, had started to limp about a month and a half ago. We did some x-rays we were told she was suffering from some kind of bone cancer. After a few weeks of pain and trying to find some kind of relief through multiple drugs we realized she was suffering and it wasn’t fair. We had to put her to sleep 2 weeks ago today and it was so sad and so hard to go through. Our family has had enough of cancer and enough of this black cloud over our heads…we just want a break and some happy news to happen. Cancer sucks. Enough is enough. 

For anyone that ever had the chance to meet her, they know she was by far the sweetest dog. She had such an amazing gentle and  loving demeanor to her. I remember one of my friends telling me that before she met Megan she never believed dogs had souls. But Megan changed her mind and after meeting her, she truly believed they did.  I have so many memories of Meg growing up. She made such an impact on my love for animals and wanting to work with them. Even after I had long moved out of the house she would come for sleepovers and still lay on my bed all night long. I was the only person she did that to - everyone else she slept on the floor after a couple hours. My husband and her would fight over his side of the bed - I would bring her up and cuddle her. I miss her so much and would do anything to have some more time with her...

Love you Megan…see you on the other side